Calvin
in Hobbes by Bill Watterson
As you probably know, Calvin and Hobbes comic books are the best out
there. Bill Watterson has some of the greatest quotes ever, so read
on and enjoy!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Wow, look at the grass stains on my skin. I say, if you knees
aren’t green by the end of the day, you ought to seriously re-examine
your life.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“Mom will you drive me into town?” Reply “Why should
I drive you, Calvin? It’s a perfect day outside! What do you think
people have feet for?”
“To work the gas pedal.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists
elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
Calvin talking to Hobbs, “When a kid grows up, he has to be something.
He can’t just stay the way he is. But a tiger grows up and stays
a tiger why is that?”
Hobbs replies, “No room for improvement.
Calvin, “Of all the luck, my parents had to be humans.”
Hobbs, “Don’t take it too hard. Humans provide some very
important protein.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
After Calvin nails Susie with a snowball he walks up to her and says
“I must say, the stinging snow makes your cheeks look positively
radiant.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“Love makes the world go round!”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“It’s not summer if your tongue isn’t purple.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“Summer is butter on your chin and corn mush between every tooth.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“I have a hammer. I can put things together! I can knock things
apart! I can alter my enviroment at will and make an incredible din
all the while!…… Ah, it’s great to be male!”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“It’s a cruel season that makes you get ready for bed while
it’s light out.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“This food is allergic to me.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
Calvin says to Hobbs, “I’ve noticed that when we play games
with girls you get captured a lot.” Hobbs replies, “Some
of us are just irresistible.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“To make a bad day worse spend it wishing for the impossible”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“Childhood is short, maturity is forever.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“Life’s disappointments are harder to take when you don’t
know any swear words.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
Hobbes: “Do you think there is a God?” Calvin: “Well,
somebody's out to get me.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“The more you think about things, the weirder they seem. Take
milk for example. Why do we drink COW milk? Who was the guy who first
looked at a cow and said. "I think I'll drink whatever comes out
of these things when I squeeze 'em!”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“Aaugh! It's a half-hour later than it was half an hour ago!
Run! Run!”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“Work fascinates me, I can watch it for hours.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“I've got plenty of common sense.... I just choose to ignore
it.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“I’m not a vegetarian! I’m a dessertarian.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“Today for show and tell I’ve brought a tiny marvel of
nature: a single snowflake. I think we might all learn a lesson from
how this utterly unique and exquisite crystal… ..turns into an
ordinary boring molecule of water just like every other one when you
bring it in the classroom. And now. While the analogy sinks in. I’ll
be leaving you drips and going outside.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“A smoke grenade, a gas mask, and a helicopter....... that's
all I ask.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“Girls are like slugs – they probably serve some purpose,
but it’s hard to imagine what!”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“I’d hate to have a kid like me!”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“There's an inverse relationship between how good something is
for you, and how much fun it is.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“In my opinion, we don't devote nearly enough scientific research
to finding a cure for jerks.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“Why waste time learning, when ignorance is instantaneous?”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“’tis the season to advertise.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“Obviously my body doesn’t believe a word my brain is saying.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“What on earth am I doing inside on this beautiful day?! This
is the only life I’ve got to live!!
- Calvin and Hobbes
“There aren’t very many heroes these days. Who is out there
to inspire us with a personal example of virtue and self-sacrifice in
the name of a higher good? Who can we look up to? Business Leaders?
Sports Figures? Politicians? Celebrities? Heck, we’re lucky if
they don’t end up in prison! As usual, the hero business is up
to me!”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“People don’t realize what a burden it is being a genius
like me. It’s not easy having a mind that operates on a higher
plane than everyone else! People just refuse to see that I’m the
crux of all history, a boy of destiny.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“I want to be introduced as “Calvin, boy of destiny.”
But you have to say it right, pause a little after “boy,”
and say “Destiny” a bit slower and deeper for ephasis. Say
it, “Boy….. Of Dessstiny,” Like that!”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“True friends are hard to come by…..I need more money.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“I propose we leave math to the machines and go play outside.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“You can present the material, but you can't make me care.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
" People pay more attention to you when they think you're up to
something."
- Calvin and Hobbes
“Getting an inch of snow is like winning 10 cents in the lottery.”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“Homework, I command thee, BE DONE!”
- Calvin and Hobbes
“It is man's indomitable nature to scare himself silly for no
good reason!”
- Calvin and Hobbes
Back to Top
|
